Christmas Eve

I am big on anticipation - it's one of my favorite feelings, knowing something is coming up, preparing for it, waiting for it, being excited. I love it. That means Christmas Eve is the big day for me, it holds so much promise. That's what I love Thursdays, they hold so much promise of what could happen on the weekend. Last night I finished reading Randy Pausch's "The Last Lecture" and he talked about being a Tigger or an Eyeore. I think I'm definitely a Tigger. Especially this time of year!

It's been a busy couple of weeks, there were holiday preparations, end of the year preparations (mostly for school and work) and travel preparations. Angela and I made it home Saturday without incident and landed in Detroit to fresh snow. I loved it!!! And we've gotten a lot more snow since I've been here and no matter what anyone else says (even people in my house saying it loudly), I LOVE THE SNOW. It makes it Christmas. It makes it winter. It makes me feel like cooking and baking and sitting and staring at the Christmas tree for hours.

So far we've been to church and caught up with old friends there, been to two grandparents' homes several times and done some wrapping and shopping and more wrapping and baking and of course, the obligatory visit to Urgent Care. It's not a trip home for me without this. One year it was an infected toe nail, another it was a double lung infection, this summer it was poison ivy that got out of control (I'm apparently allergic) and yesterday it was this stupid cold that's been brewing for ten days and only seemed to get worse. So my mom shipped Ang (who's also sick) and I both off to the Urgent Care and I got to see Dr. Ali again ("I'm Dr. Ali - A- L - I." -- so glad he cleared that up for me). Apparently I was sicker than I'd let on because I left with ten days of antibiotics, 10 days of steroids, and Claritin D. And so far, I feel worse. But yeah know, I'm not going to let it dampen my anticipation.

I'm making my cousin Jamee's fabulous pineapple dressing for dinner today, I'm helping get the house ready for Christmas morning, I'm enjoying the decorations and can't wait to see what Santa brings tomorrow!!!

Merry Christmas everyone. I hope you have a wonderful holiday however you're celebrating this year and know I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as I celebrate the baby Jesus' birth and a week of family and friends (we get four family Christmases here in Michigan!).

Advent Devotional

I volunteered to write an piece for my church's Advent Devotional and here it is:

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit.
--I Thessalonians 5:16-19

When I was in grad school I knew a couple of guys who were movie nuts. Their favorite was National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. I loved that because it’s one of my family’s favorite holiday movies as well. But while my family tries to get in just one viewing before Christmas, these guys would watch it in April, July, whenever!

When I read my scripture verse I was immediately drawn to the last line, “do not quench the Spirit” and I thought about those guys and that movie. And I thought about how we play Christmas music earlier and earlier each year and how in September there are already Christmas decorations in the stores. But mostly I thought about how sometimes we quench the Spirit, especially at Christmastime, by focusing on trees and gifts and parties. We worry more about accommodating houseguests than what the holiday actually represents.

And that’s where Christmas Vacation comes in. That movie, that tale of a man trying to create the perfect holiday experience for his family, is the perfect example of what we, yes, even us church-going Christians, do to Christmas. And if you watch it all the way to the end, you’ll find out what Clark Griswold found out: it’s just not worth it. All the shopping and the cooking and the people pleasing. It doesn’t make Christmas Christmas. So what does? Doing things like watching Christmas Vacation with your family. Making one batch of cookies, instead of forty, and talking to your friends while you let them stir the batter. Taking time each day to read an advent devotional. (If you’re reading this, you’re ahead of the curve!) Taking a moment after reading a Christmas card you’ve just received to pray for the sender.

Yes, yes, it’s easy to say if we do these things, Christmas will be all bright and shiny. And maybe it will. Or maybe, more realistically, Christmas will become more of a personal celebration of your Savior than a holiday process we have to trudge through. So “rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit!” His will is for you to celebrate His birthday, so get to it!

I am blown away

I really don't know what happened. Tuesday night I had my third table read. It went well. It was the end of my first quarter of film school and I was supposed to have the first act of my script finished. I did, then some. I had 58 pages finished, 21 of which I took to class for the table read (we're supposed to take 15 pages but I wanted the whole last scene read so I took all I had, and yes, I took crap for it, and no, I didn't care!).

And then on Wednesday I started writing again. I took the comments from the read and revised, rewrote a little and kept going. It's weird since the next deadline for my next table read isn't until January 13th, 2009 and I didn't need to keep going. Usually what that means is I procrastinate. But I didn't. And then today - just over 2 days later, I FINISHED MY SCRIPT!

I know! I can't believe it either. It's 90 pages long which I think is a good draft, that equates to about 90 minutes on screen - an hour and a half. Long enough to enjoy your popcorn, short enough that your butt doesn't fall asleep.

But yeah, DONE. I am really beside myself right now. And I know, I know, it's not perfect. It's not the final draft, it's not anywhere close but for right now, it's done. It's my script, it's done literally THIRTEEN WEEKS EARLY, and I'm pretty darn happy with it. I think my writing has improved tenfold this quarter thanks to my teachers and peers at UCLA and I am just incredibly happy! Really, no idea what else to say except - YAY!

The Arabian Bazaar

Ang's kids have been working on a very cool project for the last month or so. They've been planning and preparing for an Arabian Bazaar. They've been writing business plans, studying ancient mathematical lessons, writing research papers and finally, today, selling their "wares" at a bazaar. And I got invited.

After having taught in a middle school where field trip was a dirty term and where anything too outside the box was considered taboo, it was awesome to see what this team of teachers pulled off - together. They have almost 200 kids and they'd all planned their lessons together, coordinating them so that the kids could spend half of today having this great experience.

Each group was given a set amount of money and had to rent a stall at the bazaar (2 tables cost more so they had to decide how much space they really needed), pay for chairs, rent microwaves, etc. They also had to supply their own wares. There was a lot of diversity. I saw boxes of marbles, loved stuffed animals, lots of candy and pop, homemade cookies and brownies, store bought cupcakes, hand-rolled sushi. The first stall I stopped at was manned by Walter. I've heard stories about Walter and I was excited to see him again today. He offered me a free sample, because I'm a teacher (they don't quite get it that I'm not a teacher there at John Burroughs, probably because I'm around so much, and I have given up correcting them. There are worse names to be called!). He was pretty proud of his casserole dish filled with french fries and cut up hot dogs. I stabbed a fry and a hot dog piece and swallowed the lukewarm concoction and he smiled away.

I ate brownie bites and cookies and stuffed my pockets with gum and candy. I bartered a bag of cotton candy one child had given me for a bottle of water. I ate too many of these awesome mini-cupcakes by one child who's mom is a professional baker. I took pictures and complimented them on their menus and signs. I even had a smoothie with the secret ingredient of jolly ranchers (actually, not bad, very sweet but not bad). It was great to see kids be so inventive. They were popping corn right there, making deals on the spot (one Coke-$1, two Cokes-$2, what a deal!), blending smoothies, decorating cupcakes and trying to figure out if they had enough money for one more hot dog or one more cup of raman noodles.

At the end they had to settle up with their social studies teacher, making sure they could pay their rent. It was great to see them working with "money", being responsible, AND having fun all at the same time. So I say - AWESOME JOB JOHN BURROUGHS MAGNET TEACHERS! You rock! I hope these kids know how lucky they are to have you in their lives!!!

Quote of the Day
Girl - Who's older, you or Ms. Knapp?
Me - Me.
Girl - By how much.
Me - (Hold up 3 fingers.)
Girl - So you're 31.
Me - Yep.
Girl - You're three years older than my mom. But way younger than my grandma!

Fantastic!

A third of the way done

It's hard to believe that I'm officially a third of the way done with program at UCLA already. It's gone by so fast and it's been all I'd hoped for and nothing I could have ever imagined. I've also finished over half of my first script and I'm pretty excited about that. Tonight I had my last table read of the quarter and it went so well - lots of new ideas and lots to write! I'm determined to have a lot more done by the time I get back to class the first week of January.

And it was a great night of celebration in addition to our table reads. We brought snacks and there was even wine (a new experience for me - alcohol DURING a class - but it was fun!) and really just enjoyed being with one another. Giving ideas, listening, I had a blast and I can't wait to do it again. For me, with writing being such a solitary activity, and now with my job teaching online (i.e., alone in my house), I'm really enjoying the heck out of the interactions in the classroom.

Other than that things are good. Homeless lunch was busy today - new faces and old and good conversations with new friends. I've also been helping Ang with some grading every day after school, book reports. And can I just say, she has some amazing kids! (To quote one student's report - "And as you know Ms. Knapp, I'm the class comedian, not the class clown!" Priceless.)

And I'm counting down the days till Christmas, my favorite time of the year. I did some online shopping and shipping to Howell tonight (which is why I'm online so late) and did some baking today that got me in the mood. I can't wait to get home and sit by the tree and see the snow and wear my flannel nightgown and be with my family. I can't wait!

The rest will follow...

I go to school with people who want to be screenwriters, who are, for all intents and purposes, screenwriters. I have met a lot of screenwriters here in L.A. In fact, it seems everyone's a writer. But I haven't met many who have had movies or television shows made. And then Nancy Oliver came to my Monday night lecture class.

I expected someone younger, not that she's old, certainly not but she seems more seasoned than I'd imagined. She wrote Lars and the Real Girl and worked on Six Feet Under (HBO) and now works on True Blood (HBO). She's a writer and a director and on Monday night, she was fascinating. She was calm and insightful and very open and sounded very honest.

Over the past quarter I've heard a lot about structure and theme and plot and act breaks. I've read books about where to put the inciting events in my screenplay and what characters need to have storylines where and when. I've learned about systems for writing and rewriting and I've even done some of it. But all along it's felt a bit like a process, a bit artificial. I have done all the assignments, created all the timelines and scenes and outlines and character sketches. But I've also been writing for a lot of years and I know me. I know my head and I know how I work. And what Nancy Oliver said on Monday that screamed to me was to arrange your work habits around how YOU do it best.

That stuck with me all week. Tuesday I tried writing before going to Homeless Lunch, after reading half a script for class and before taking a shower. I was having an ADD morning. Nothing worked. So when I came home I read. I gave up writing for the day. I knew it wouldn't work at all. I know how I do it best. Today I only had a half hour before I had to leave for an appointment but I felt the need to get some things down and before I knew it, I had several pages knocked out. I'm finally starting to realize how I work best. And I think that if I let myself know that that's okay, it will be.

Nancy had a lot of other interesting insights into writing, screenwriting as a career, and Lars. I'll share a few for those who asked for reports:

On writing

• There was simply nothing else she could do - she couldn't pass the test to be a teacher in California so she had to keep writing.
• It took her five years to move from writing plays to screenplays. She had to learn to see as the camera sees.
• She discovers who her characters are through the writing. She often doesn't know what will happen to them until the end.
• There is a difference between intuitive and technical writing and we need both. You need to be able to fix something if it doesn't work - do the job required.
  
• No one does character like Shakespeare.
  
• You can be a good writer when you're young and when you're old - you can be a good writer all along. You just can't go any faster than you're meant to go. But you can do your best. It not only has to do with age but with experience. Don't edit your experience.
• Acts in screenplays are great if they're helpful, if not, throw them out.
  

On career

• There is a difference between writing for film and writing for television. For TV, it's a discipline and it's a community effort. It's writing by committee but it's worth it - moneywise and it's good to learn different disciplines. It's good to see how good a writer you can be with so many obstacles. For instance, if you're given a direction for a story, you have to write it so you might as well see how well you can do the job.
• If it works, it's okay with her. For example, it was Ryan Gosling's idea to talk to the doll in Lars. It worked so she thought it was okay.
• She believes there can be drama without conflict. Tension is more interesting.
  

On Lars

• She got the idea for Lars and then didn't write anything for five years. But she finished the draft in nine months - the draft she turned in, the draft that after rewrites were thrown away would become the shooting script.
  
• She didn't know Bianca would die when she started writing.
• She was on set for the entire shoot and she's happy with 95% of the movie. She's happier with it now than she was then.
  
• She doesn't know what happens after Lars goes on that walk but she does know asking someone to go on the walk with him was a BIG step.
  
• The scene at the late in the water was ambiguous on purpose - was it meant as baptism? As murder? The audience has to decide for itself.
• Bianca weighed a hundred pounds and had a flexible face that made nine expressions used throughout the movie.

Nancy ended the evening with advice to all of us screenwriters aspiring to be where she is: she said not to follow her example. We're already ahead of her because of where we are. Her thing was not about success or career it was about being a good writer. Tell the truth, the rest will follow, she said. And I believe her.