I just need one

I’m kind of freaking out. It’s Thursday of my first week of spring break from the elementary school where I work each morning. It’s also the first week of the new quarter for my online university where I work each day. It’s 8:45am. I’m doing with the online stuff. I even prepped my postings for next week knowing I’ll be a bit busier next week. But I’m done. I’ve checked all my emails. I’ve read Facebook and Twitter several times over. I’ve read my Lenten devotion. I’ve read the paper. Yes, I need to make the bed and shower but other than that? I’m done for the day. It kind of freaks me out.

I’ve sent my “Good Wife” script out to some people to read and I’m awaiting feedback. So there’s nothing left to do there. Two rewrites and I’m done, which is weird for me. I don’t have another script to work on right now. Yes. I have a pilot that needs another go but I’m not sure I’m mentally or emotionally ready to bring those characters back into my life at the moment. They’ve been with me three years. A long three years. And they’re on vacation now. It’s good for them. And me.

I need to keep writing. But I don’t have anything to write. It’s so weird. I want to write. I have time to write but instead, I have to think. Ugh. The hard part of the job for me is always plotting. Making the story make sense in my head before writing it down. That invisible labor Victor Hugo speaks so fondly of. 

I have a novel that is perched center on my desk (I have an L-shaped desk, so it’s in the center of the other side of the desk). It needs to be edited. So badly. It cries to me every day. But I really don’t know where to begin or what to do. I wish I did. It wants to be seen. It wants to be read. I want that too. 

My to-do list is dwindling. It has things on it like ‘rewrite Trophy Husbands’ – oh, okay self, I’ll just rewrite an entire movie. Sure, no biggie for today. It also has on it ‘come up with new ideas’ – oh, okay, check. Moving on, what’s next.

New ideas. New characters. It’s scary. It’s exciting, yes, but it’s even more scary. I want to write a spec script of ‘Community’. I have the vaguest inkling of an idea. Really just four words. Not enough to write about. I need more.

I have an idea for a half-hour sitcom but really, it’s someone else’s idea, from a book, and I need to make it my own. It’s hard because the book was freaking awesome.

What to do? I know, a high-class problem. I’ll probably do some laundry. Make the bed. Shower, maybe curl my hair. I might attempt to make some Easter cards. Maybe I’ll watch “The Sweet Smell of Success” which has been sitting by the TV for way too long. Good thing Netflix doesn’t charge late fees. Maybe I’ll watch some ‘Community’ and try to be inspired. 

I need a good idea. Just one. Or a hundred. I’m not picky. Here goes…