Twelve Years Later

When Angela mentioned Patriot Day last week I said, "What?" For the life of me I didn't remember that 9/11 had been renamed. (And as of last year it's now Patriot Day and National Day of Service and Remembrance). Generations down the line will call it that maybe (well Patriot Day anyway, that last part is a mouthful), although it will take some time for us to drop the ominous tone in our voice that distinguishes September Eleventh from September Tenth or any other day of the year. It may never happen, and I suppose that's okay. Right even.

It's been 12 years.

And yet? It seems like yesterday.

And yet? It seems a like a lifetime ago.

The students in Angela's sixth grade class weren't born the day the towers fell. They don't recall first hand watching the Pentagon burn on television or hearing of the brave women and men in the air. Take that in for a second.

Yeah. I can't fathom it either. But it's true.

And yet, their lives are still affected by that day. Just as mine is. Just as yours is. Each year 9/11 becomes a little more of our history, a little less of our reality but still, it's there. When we travel. When we take the elevator up a tall building. When we watch the news and hear words like air strikes and chemical weapons and terrorist attacks. It's there.

And yet? It's not.

Twelve years is a long time. A lifetime for some of us. I've lived in three states, four places, had over a dozen jobs, written thousands of pages of prose, scripts and news copy. It's a long time.

Do we still all remember exactly where we were that Tuesday morning? Of course. In fact, at the dinner party following my table read two weeks ago somehow the topic came up and we went around the room, telling our stories. It's a part of who we are, what we've become, individually and collectively.

Do I wish it had never happened? Certainly. Without a doubt. But am I thankful for the aftermath and how that has affected, even changed, my life? Yes, I think so. In grad school I studied group communication in depth and I learned how groups (be they corporations, families, friends, communities, any group really) come to be. There's the stages of forming, storming and norming. And for us? Collectively -- whether in small groups or large, that was a day and the period that followed it, of weathering those storms and becoming a group. Becoming better as a whole and as one.

Twelve years is quite a milestone. To look how far we've come and yet, how far we've gone, is important. Do I need to watch the clips of that day over and over? No. And if some do, that's what they need. But for me? Today is about remembering, celebrating, and knowing that we've come this far because on September Eleventh I'm not sure any of us thought we'd see another day, let alone 4,383 days.