And the notes go on...

This morning I spent a very nice hour sitting at my desk talking about my sitcom pilot with a very nice woman via Skype. We discussed the story, the characters, the tone, TVLand shows, pilots, even whether or not a woman leaving a woman for a man is funnier than a woman leaving a woman for another woman or for no reason at all.

Just a regular notes session.

After the table read of a few weeks ago, I've just had the script for my sitcom pilot sitting here on my desk, staring at me. Yes, it's on top of the pile above the female arson investigator pilot needing a rewrite and the baseball pilot that doesn't need a rewrite but just needs to get made so it can't go away and be forgotten just yet. Yes, it's got a few scribbled notes on it. And no, I didn't know what to do with it next.

So Producer Extraordinaire Sonora suggested we have someone she's worked with in the past read through it, a sitcom consultant/writer, who's very good. And of course, I jumped at the chance. A) I love it when anyone, anywhere wants to read what I've written. B) If they want to read it and discuss it, all the better. And C) See above. I didn't know what to do with it next.

So I sent her the script earlier this week and fast forward to today. And the notes meeting. And no, she didn't comment on commas or phrases or anything like that. We were talking big picture things. And it was pretty great.

First she asked me to tell her the story in my own words. Which I'm getting better at, by the way. I'm not at pitching to the network good level yet but I'm getting there. I talked about why we're meeting these characters on this particular day and why they are all together in one story. I talked about their personalities and choices and motivation. I talked about jokes and throwaways and little asides. And she asked questions. Lots and lots of questions.

She told me what bumped with her, what she had to go back and read several times to understand, and what seemed muddy. And then at the end, after I had pages and pages of scribbled upon legal pad paper, I asked her my final questions: Is the script funny? Is the story good?

I held my breath as she answered. I wasn't nervous, just curious. Sometimes when you write alone in a room you truly don't know what works and what doesn't. I often love what I've written (as opposed to many writers I know who hate every single thing on their pages). I write things that move me, interest me, make me laugh. And then sometimes you take that script out into the world and have people read it but those people all know you and genuinely like or love you and are biased. Even if they don't realize it. Or they want to work with you and maybe don't want to hurt your feelings or burn bridges. So feedback can be tricky.

And I'm not saying that someone who's been paid to give it isn't going to be biased. There's definitely a customer provider relationship here. But...at some point you have to trust.

She said that the concept is strong. She said that it's genuinely funny. She said that the work I need to do is all underneath and perhaps people who've read it don't have notes because my dialogue and jokes are well done. She likened it to a sketch that needs to be turned into a painting. I like that idea. It'll still be recognizable when I'm done but it'll be so much more focused and brighter. It'll be complete.

Do I have to take her notes? Listen to what she said? No.

Do I want to make my script better? Yes.

And that means listening. Listening when it's read out loud. Listening when people give me suggestions or tell me what they don't get. Listening when the voice in my head says, "You know, she's right about that."

So what's next? Another draft. And then more notes. And probably another draft. And more notes. And the notes will go on and on and on until we're standing on a sound stage giving notes to the actors. And those notes need to be crystal clear so I'd better get painting...